Grim Spin-off Redux

This blog update is brought to you by: GUILT. Are you tired of feeling completely self-satisfied and accomplished? Do you seem relatively at ease with the decisions you make and don't make? Well, fear not!  Because now there's GUILT, from the makers of "eating carbs while dieting." Now you can feel GUILTY for things like not updating your blog. Or maybe that's just me.

Anyways, I've noticed there has been a severe lack of "grim" on this so-called GRIM BLOG and so I thought it'd be nice to post some more Grim Spin-off pics. And... um... here they are (let's just pretend there was a clever introduction, you know what they sound like so why belabor the point?):

Inspired by Jesse DuRona

In the far-flung future, where robots and alliteration reign supreme: There is a robot whose sole programming is to shut down the systems of others! Watch out machines with artificial intelligence! Because the Grim Bot is here to FORCE QUIT your expletive!

Inspired by Kevin Uehlein

While the pigs may have been able to overthrow their human overlords in the APORKALYPSE, there is one force they can't escape: Death! And who else but a Grim *snicker* Pork to fry their collective bacon. *snort*

Inspired by Lena Chandhok

In the frozen wasteland of Antarctica, the Grim Yeti waits to bring death to those who dare venture into its domain... in the CUTEST way imaginable.

Inspired by Max Mose

The Grim Terror doesn't bring death so much as scathing criticism to societal norms with humor, intelligence, and a lot of hatching.

And that concludes today's update! Apologies to all parties involved.

"We need a Resolution; We have so much Confusion."

Is it really a new year already? Wow, it's amazing how time flies when you're having fun and repeating trite sentiments. And what a year it's been! I mean, a few years ago I was just another struggling actress, only getting bit parts in episodes of Law & Order: SVU and starring in ill-conceived remakes of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Flash-forward to the present and I'm starring alongside Hollywood big-shot Daniel Craig in the film adaption of the INTERNATIONAL bestseller: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. 

Or at least, that's how this blog would have started if it were the personal blog of Rooney Mara. It'd also mean I'd be far less approachable and difficult to get along with (and yes, that is my attempt at starting an internet feud with Rooney Mara).

As for my year, it's been pretty cool. It's weird to think I graduated from the Center for Cartoon Studies, moved to New York, started interning for the literary agent of comic God Grant Morrison, and became an uncle (again). When those things are placed very close together in a sentence, it makes me seem very accomplished. However, there's always room for more accomplishments. Which brings me the "meat" this blog post: New Year's Resolution(s)!

Normally, New Year's Resolutions are meant to perfect imperfection. I think we can all agree that would be IMPOSSIBLE for me since you can't perfect perfection. So, here are the ways I'm going to perfect YOUR 2012: I'm going to update more often so you have a more steady stream of me.

Also, get tighter abs and walk around without my shirt more. You're welcome.

Obligatory sketch:

Next post: Why does Rooney Mara eat babies and why does she smell like that?

Sketches Promoting Things You Totally Shouldn't Buy...

I'm going to be honest with y'all, this is perhaps my favorite time of year. The cheer and merriment in the air is almost palpable, as people rush from store to store picking up gifts for their loved ones while various holiday songs flood the airwaves fueling their capitalist desires. That's right people, I'm talking about KWANZAA! And to celebrate this Festivus of Lights and honor the messiah, Santa Christ, I have created a blog post which has nothing to do with the holidays (Out of fear of offending anyone's beliefs).

Instead I bring you more doodles from my sketch book! And since I'm off to visit family, this could very well be the last Grim Blog post this year. Luckily, the new year is in a little over a week... so you won't have to wait too long for the next.

As you can see the first doodle is another of everyone's favorite mutants: THE X-MEN! But wait, who's that in the lower right corner? That's not Cyclops, is it? Of course not STUPID. It's Megaman! Or Rockman as he is known by to my Japanese fans. To avoid cease-and-desist letters (which would actually be kind of cool to receive just to see the stationary they use...): X-men is a comics property owned by Marvel comics and Megaman is owned by Capcom.

The second doodle is of everyone's least favorite mutant: Cable! As you can tell from the picture Nathan Christopher Charles Dayspring Askani'son Summers had the mutant ability to manifest large mounds to cover up his feet. However, this power was quickly forgotten when his creator, Rob Liefeld, left to pursue creator-owned work.

See you next year!

I've been gone for a minute...

... now I'm back at the jump off blogging.

Oh boy, howdy. I didn't make a single post in November. If I was smart, I'd just treat this like how politician's wives treat affairs and pretend it never happened. So that's what I'm going to do:

Man, those November posts were crazy. I can't believe I managed to make a blog update EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Although if you haven't visited for a while, you'll notice that those 30 blog posts are no longer posted online. Apparently, they were too awesome for blogger and I had to delete them. Plus, I'm not sure what I was thinking with that November 15th post where I took that unpopular stance on that one really controversial subject that everyone seems to talk about. But let's not rehash that again (The comments on that post were crazy).

To make it up to you, here are four single-panel comics I've unearthed from my hard drive.

And while I can't promise the EPIC post count of November, I can promise at least a couple more updates this month. I wisely pulled/formatted material for the next post ahead of time. I know, I'm totally smert smart.

Vampires: The $uckening

Before reading this update, head on over to Pat Barrett's Frog Blog to read the wonderful things he has to write about me. Oh, and I suppose you could check out his great comics and illustrations while you're there too... but please come back, even though I know it's easy to get lost in his beautifully inked lines and noodle arms.

I've been sitting on this blog update for a while, unsure if I should post this mini-comic I did WAY back in 2009 (Has it really been that long? You can't tell can you? Quickly, TELL ME I'M YOUNG!). However, despite a title which some may find suspect (and possibly edited), Vampires: The $uckening remains one of my most well-received comics to date. You don't believe me? Read some of these RAVE reviews:

"You've been here for how long and all you drew was this?"

-Jesse H. Mead

"The art is much better than in your previous comics. I mean, MUCH better. No. You don't understand. There's a significant and quantifiable improvement. What changed? I DEMAND TO KNOW."

-Jason Lutes

"I don't think I get it."

-Graham Annable

With praise like that, how could I not post it for the world to see? But first, let me explain a bit about the creative process. Vampires: The $uckening was originally drawn for the CCS Bibliomancy Assignment. The assignment was to bring in an encyclopedia or dictionary of some sort and randomly flip through the pages. With each flip, I had to point to a random word or picture and this would dictate the content of the comic. My three flips were: A picture of the Lost Boys, "dhampir" and "invisible." Did I mention I was using a Vampire Encyclopedia? This is probably one of the best comic exercises to overcome "cartoonist block." It's low-stress and just gets you drawing. 

This comic was also hand-lettered, which is something I usually never do. However, the lettering on the first page doesn't look too bad. So perhaps there's hope for me yet. That's all for now!

"It's Been a Long Time (Long Time)..."

...but I shouldn't have left you (left you) without a dope beat post to step to (step to).

I know I say this at the beginning of every post, but I'm sorry for the long delay since my last post. However, if I can't be consistent with the frequency of the post, then at least I can be consistent with the message of the post! Anyways, this time I actually have a good reason to be late with an update because there's been BIG changes in my life. That's right, I recently realized that I am a platypus born into the body of a human and have made the first steps in starting my transition from human to platypus. "HTP" for short. Right now I'm taking a lot of hormones and have to live life as a platypus for year and then I can start the species reassignment surgery! I'm super-stoked.

Oh, and I also moved to New York for an internship at a Foundry Literary & Media.

Speaking of self-portraits: Whether it's James Kochalka's elf look or Scott McCloud simple, geometric look, all great cartoonists tend to have a distinct way of representing themselves in comics form. While attending the Center for Cartoon Studies, the fact I didn't have a distinct way of drawing myself always troubled me. I mean, it wasn't such a big deal, since I didn't draw comics about myself (and the subtext in me drawing myself into a Grim Bard story troubled me). However, just because I didn't NEED one, didn't mean I didn't WANT one. So, one exercise I did was to draw myself if various styles (influenced by my fellow cartoonists at CCS). See if you can spot the style!

Hint: Lawrence likes robots and playing the piano!

Hint: One survived an Aporkalypse and the other survived Beerfest!

Hint: His significant other is petrified and the other is a "bro."

Hint: Um... wait... when did I draw these?

Hint: The content is the clue and the other I didn't draw*!

Although, after this little exercise, I realized I should stop trying to copy what others do and just draw the most accurate representation of myself as possible...

That's right, I wear a tiara, punks!

And that's all for this update. The next update should be up sometime in 2013 (this way if I update before then you'll all be thoroughly impressed and praise me for my promptness)

*The buff picture of me was drawn by City of Cards artist, CJ Joughlin.

Who Run the World? (Girls)

Well, hello there. Haven't seen you in a while. Why don't you grab a seat and stay a while. We can catch up and talk about old times. Like that time I had a blog that I occasionally updated with comics and sketches. You know, kind of like what I'm doing now, but in the past.

Anyways, I've been pretty busy since my last update. Unfortunately, due to a slight rift in time and space, none of it technically happened. In fact, I'm not even sure I technically still exist. I hate when time travelers mess up perfectly good experiences in the name of "adventure." This is normally the part in a conversation where a wandering literary agent says, "I get it, you're clever. Now can we get on with it?"

I've been doing a lot of sketching lately, since I've been working at a Coin Laundry and there isn't much else to do, and so I thought I'd post a couple on the blog before I post another comic. This first sketch is a quick and simple redesign of the Grim Bard. Lately the stripped sleeves have been bothering me because whenever I have to draw one of his arms crossing his chest it makes it look like there's floating white rectangles on his tunic. So I did the simplest solution possible, I made his tunic have long sleeves. Although, he still wears stripped leggings, so all you stripe-lovers can relax (Fun Fact: Stripe-Lovers make up for more than half of The Grim Blog's readership) (Fun Fact 2: I make up these fun facts as I write the blog!).

Oh and he also wears little booties... because they are cute.

This next sketch was stolen from inspired by Adventure Time's recent gender-swap episode. Now you can see what the Grim Bard would look like if he were a she (Here's a hint: he looks basically the same except with two oranges stuffed in his shirt! Her shirt? Ugh. Gender confusion.). I decided I liked the sketch enough that I took it into illustrator and made a more polished picture.

Her hair, much like her hand, is also wavier!

Now all you guys can fantasize about dating the Grim Bard without wondering if you're gay*. I wonder if this is why they created Supergirl? That's all for this update! Until next time, this has been a not-so-grim Grim update.

*For those readers who think "gay" isn't an appropriate subject for a somewhat "all-ages" blog I will kindly direct you to my nine-year-old niece, who just explained to me what a lesbian is the other day.